Women, men and co-ed

First off, I miss spell a lot of shit and I am sorry. Its "colt .45" not "col .45", I am retarded.

Do any other college men's teams out there have trouble getting along with their women's teams? I dunno about everyone else in the country but I have played for 2, albeit extremely different, college programs out there, and the dynamics between the mens and the womens teams seem to be identical. I find women in ultimate to be as complicated as women in general and I still haven't figured out exactly how to find a place for myself in the mix of gender in this sport.

First off, my contribution to most teams that I play for is loud, vulgar, crass and blunt, not unlike my blog. Most female players/teams don't appreciate this. There are some that do, but on the whole, women as a group have touble with my antics. I care not however, and will do and say whatever I want. I feel like at this stage in life (early 20s and on) most male/female dynamics cannot eliminate romantic elements from them. What do I mean by this? In general I feel that most women at this age like non-threatening, gentle, easy going, PC men. Whether it is for relationships or not, this is generally the trend, I think. When there is physical attraction a relationship may ensue, but if a guy is basically "Millhouse" on the inside women will like him. I on the other hand, am not like this and I don't think I should have to be, on the field. Most women ultimate players see me and players like me on the field and assume that I am this intense jack ass off the field. Now perhaps this is true, but empiracle evidence is still pending and I would like the benifit of the doubt. In any event, I have played for teams that are perhaps a bit crude, crazy, loud, fun loving, and a bit vulgar, but come on, how many ultimate teams out there are not. This dynamic, I feel, is at odds with womens teams, which I feel are usually very tight amongst eachother, very positive, very PC, very well behaved and generally decent human beings. This creates some drama, I feel. You have women that have an opinion of a group of males as retarded jack asses, and maybe when they are together they are, but on the individual basis, they maybe your ideal man. For men, at least for me, I like women to be fairly up front, open minded, and have a good sense of humor. On the whole, women's teams, I feel, band together to keep their general opinion for the retardedness of the guys team consistent and unwavering, and this makes them annoying and irritating to the mens team. Hence, they are at odds, the men are too obnoxious, the women are too reserved, they hate eachother. Perhaps these differences are worked out on the individual basis and relationships (romantic or plutonic) result and good for them.

For me however, I usually get the shaft (no homo) mainly because I am usually one of the leaders of the obnoxious crowd and therefore most female disc players see me as basically evil. This is why I am not a fan of women in ultimate. Now, I do not mean that women should not play, I just chose to avoid them and this does not mean that I think women's disc is not worth watching, playing, following etc... I fully endorse women's teams everywhere and hope that women find a place in ultimate whether it be womens or co-ed. However, you won't see me anywhere near them.

I don't know how people play co-ed. I am sure there are mild mannered, well behaved males out there who are great disc players and great co-ed team mates, but I just could never see myself doing it. I would get into so much trouble. I would do my "no bubbles" cheer and women would cry. I would get chewed out if I scream "sorry barbaro, thats a break" when our D line got us a break. I couldn't do pump up speeches, I couldn't explain my open side cuts in my usually vulgar and comedic manner, I couldn't tell stories during stretches, I basically would have to keep my mouth shut all the time, and thats just not gonna happen. I just can't see myself playing/coaching anywhere near a woman and have her maintain even the slighest positive opinion of me.

That is why I have never dated within the ultimate circle, that and most ultimate circles are about as incestuous as rural Alabama. I want a woman I am seeing, or maybe just a friend, to see me on the field more the way a cheerleader or spectator sees a player. Not from a peer level but as an observer (not the ultimate kind) and I think that works better for me. Women that know me from disc think I funny, entertaining, but foolishly obscene and thats ok. Not sure if most folks out there are like this, I just think that the standard boyfriend/girlfriend on the same co-ed team, or girl and guy captain couples from mens and womens teams is basically pretty unattainable and undesirable for me. Plus, I don't really find women's players all that attractive, something about grass stains and sweat thats just not a turn on. I do however know many gentlemen out there that love it when a woman gets a nice layout D or puts up a good flick break, just not me.

I suppose I am opening myself to some interesting heckles and I welcome them, I just have a somewhat unorthodox opinion of women in ultimate and I thought it was worth sharing. All those guys out there that can iso their girlfriend on the field or consult them for playing advice, good for you, you are lucky. I on the other hand would prefer to just have to explain the game to a significant other and let her be the ignorant, yet supportive cheer leader.

I sincerly hope I am not alone on this one, but there is a chance that I am and that is more than OK with me. That is why god invented women's B teams. There you have women that love ultimate, but aren't necessarily great at it, spend most of their time partying instead of track work outs and generally enjoy the company of retarded college guys, not unlike myself. Maybe not the kind of girl you wanna bring home to mom, but a spring break fling or the casual makeout by the keg is pretty solid.

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